No More Nap Time: Wine Tastings Don't Have to Suck

You head into the shop or bar that's advertising the "Not your average wine tasting" or "A wine tasting without the pretentiousness" hoping that they are telling the truth. All you want is to hang out, hear some interesting knowledge get dropped, and enjoy yourself while drinking some tasty wines.  

Is it a crime to go get a little buzz after work and pick a bottle or two of something you really like without feeling pressured to buy something specific? Is there a law against making a few friends and listening to some nice tunes? Apparently at most wine tastings, it is.

Most of the time you still end up getting a tasting led by a 45-70 year old guy named Dante, sporting a popped collar or an apron. He sits you down like a 5th grader telling you how "special these wines you are tasting truly are".  Did he just say the wine was powerfully elegant? Can I relate to this guy? What is he talking about? Why do I feel like ghouls are circling above us, making me feel uneasy? I came in this place to chill and relax but now I feel like I'm in one of Amon Goeth's sorting lines. One wrong move and I'll be wearing a shiny little luger bullet in the middle of my brain.

No one knows who will actually talk to them or if people are even allowed talk during the "lesson". There is a group of people in a circle low talking pretty seriously but you don't know if they will let you approach them. They know Dante the tasting master; they are regulars. You might get a little chat in with some one about their opinion on the wine, but nothing too serious for fear you might say something stupid or incorrect about the wines characteristics. Maybe you'll just talk about the weather for a bit to be safe. This is Italian wine from Sicily? You went to Venice one time 25 years ago? How serious/lame is this damn tasting right now!? If it wasn't for the iPad note taking and the in-crowd's low talking, the room would be silent. You go home feeling more confused about wine than you were before you arrived. Why can't everyone just act normal at these things. What the hell just happened?

If wine events keep creating scenarios like this then how will they ever shed these stereotypes and false categorizations that wine is boring, intimidating and not for people who don't drink a lot of wine. 

It's an era where the world is full of outstanding wines. They are out there for the picking, you just have to know where to find them. People who say they aren't wine drinkers, why not?  There is a flavor and style out there for everyone! You don't like the taste? Maybe. But please don't say you hate movies if the only DVDs you have in your collection are The Room and The Sorcerer's Apprentice. Please don't say you don't really like music when your favorite band is Final Placement or B44. Try drinking quality wine in an environment you feel comfortable in and then make your decision. If you do this I guarantee the chances of you having a pleasant wine tasting experience will go up ten fold.


 I blame these unfortunate opinions of wine on the lack of places for non wine drinkers to learn and taste without feeling intimidated.


  Also, don't forget that wine doesn't have to be expensive to be good. Finding wines with the highest quality at the lowest price should be the main goal for every wine drinker.


Most importantly, have fun and don't let Dante and his pink polo (and lame wine chatter) represent the wine community and all tasting events. Wine events should be fun, entertaining and educational all at the same time.


Come visit The Alcove at Two Tartes Cafe and Catering Thursdays evenings for the new generation of kick ass, entertaining and educational tasting events.